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Dreams Posted at the Dream Forum & Interpreted by Gerard

Dream Title: lost/driving/out of control

Submitted by Jan
Age: 51
Date Posted: May 20, 2005

The Dream

hope someone can help with this dream: First I'm in the backseat of the car, the car is moving, my 14 year old son is in the passenger side, no one is in the driver's seat. This is (in real life) my boyfriend's car, but he's not in the dream, just the thought that this is his car, and I'm concerned about getting in an accident. Somehow, I get into the driver's seat, but I can't see where I'm going - it's dark, the road is unfamiliar, overgrown, narrow. But the car is still moving forward. I'm in a panic, lost, feeling out of control of where the car is headed. I feel like I need direction from my boyfriend at the same time I'm afraid of wrecking his car and injuring myself and my son. I woke up in a panic, face down in my pillow!

The Interpretation

Three possibilities I see in this dream. Actually more when you combined two or more together {dreams symbols can have more than one meaning}.

The first:
There is some situation in your life where you do not feel you are in control {being in the backseat}. Your life is moving forward but you feel you are not controlling this certain aspect, or perhaps many aspects of your life. Your son is probably the most important thing in your life right now. This situation may involve your boyfriend. Perhaps deep down you feel he has too much control of your life. When you think you have the whole situation figured out, doubts re-appear. You are still going forward with the situation {relationship?} as it is but again deep down you feel lost and do not know where it is going. You feel that whole thing could fall apart and there would be more harm to you and your son from the experience.

Or it could be the reverse, and you wish he {boyfriend} would have more input into your life. But that may cause problems with who you are, and who he is. There may not be a perfect match, in which case you would have to give up some control in yyour life. Some of this may involve your son and how he gets along with your boyfriend. The doubts and fears are still there as in the first part of the interpretation. You look to your boyfriend for support and either it is not there or you are afraid of giving up certain control of aspects in your life.

Thirdly, your boyfriend may symbolize another part of your own psyche. Normally in such a case your boyfriend would possess qualities that you wish you had. Perhaps you do not use your masculine qualities {see anima/animus at left for definition} or possess the masculine qualities needed to be in control of your life. Your masculine side is not strong enough to support you and you feel venerable to failure or not always being as strong as you wish you could {fear of accidents}. Your son would represent the same vulnerablity you feel because of undeveloped masculine traits. Often when this interpretation fits, another aspect as in my first interpretation would also in some way apply. You could possess weak mascilune aspects, and at the same time there could be issues involving your real boyfriend. The control issue may play here. THis is what I meant by two meanings withion the same dream using the same symbols.

Look to which of the above fits best in your life. If you have questions post them and we look go further at the possibilities. As in all dreams I request a follow-up to determine where I was on the mark and maybe not on. It gives not only me better insights to interpreting dreams but also those many people who participate in the forum.We all learn from each dtream and each interpretation. And if I may be so bold to say, by using Jung as the source we all do a pretty good job of it. Do I hear an amen?

Response to Interpretation

Amen.... thank you, Gerard! I knew there was a lot of symbolism in this dream, but I had no idea I'd feel so transparent! I think your first interpretation is pretty much on the mark. I am dependent on my boyfriend to a certain extent - he is letting me drive his extra car so that my older son can use mine - and he has loaned me money to pay off some high interest credit cards. We've been together 10 months, but we live about 2 hours apart, so it is a major life-changing event for us to end up living together, and he has expressed some reluctance to commit to that right now, while I am feeling more ready. He refuses to discuss it, not in a mean way, but he just keeps our conversations light and changes the subject whenever I get the nerve to bring it up, and I just keep letting him "steer our course" although I have no idea where it's headed.
My son is a big part of the equation. He looks up to my boyfriend as a father figure, and they get along really well. Of course he would be hurt if the relationship wasn't going in the direction I hope it will.

I can also see how your third interpretation is true. Before this relationship, I was single for about 7 years, in total control over my life, and I thought of myself as a good provider and decision-maker. Now I find myself in more of traditional feminine role of letting the man make the moves and the decisions about our direction. It seems like this dream is telling me that I'm really scared of getting "lost" in this relationship, and the lack of conversation about it is causing a lot of stress. were right on. Thanks!

Gerard's Response

Thanks Jan for your response to the interpretation. My first impression was included in my first interpretation but I try not to leave any stone unturned when providing my conclusions. Some dreams are more about the personal aspect {as yours was} and others go to the deeper aspect which reflects the inner psyche and the personality. By responding and confirming the interpretation you have provided us with further insights as how the dream functions. Jung's philosophy of the dream has time and again proven to be correct.

Thanks again for posting the dream and follow-up. Please feel welcome to post future dreams for interpretation. Pass the word along to your friends that we at the forum are ready to help with any dream.


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